Hell.

The ninth month should just be referred to as hell. I don't care how much you love  pregnancy, the ninth month is still just hell. I woke up this morning at 4am feeling incredibly nauseous and had so much back pain and crampiness. I laid there for about 30 minutes and then woke Joe up to time it and as soon as I as started to think, "well maybe this is it." they tapered back off again and left me feeling even more sore and miserable then I was before. So then we went to our appointment today and I asked them to check me and... nothing. No dilation, 0% effacement, and we are so freaking frustrated I can not even begin to tell you. I've been doing it all, walking, primrose oil, raspberry leaf tea, spinning babies exercises, eating weird stuff and basically every thing that people who have had babies have told me to do. Nothing y'all, absolutely nothing. I even started ripping down wallpaper in the kitchen because I convinced myself that if I get half way through a project he's probably going to show up.

 I was telling my dad on the phone the other day that maybe we jinxed ourselves when Joe named him Reeves because this kid is acting just like a Reeves- stubborn, you don't tell me, on my time, Reeves. The next 18 years should be fun for me, I am going to pay for my raisin'.

Speaking of my raisin'... I have seriously been considering saving up as much money as possible and sinking it into my old black pickup simply for the fact that when Reeves makes it to 16, I want to be able to hear what that kid is doing. I mean, do you know how hard it is to sneak out of the house when your ride sounds like a race car? Not so easy kids... and pushing that sucker to the road doesn't help so much either. Mom may not of heard it but I know Dad did. Joe is completely against this idea however, he believes and most of my family agrees that Colonel is a lost cause and the years of rust and neglect are going to be hard to come back from. However... he still starts up just fine every single time so I am holding onto a little hope.

 

Also... I have developed a new list of rants... I know how much you enjoy my negativity so here we go:

 

Ten 3rd Trimester Rants

1. If you have never been pregnant and do not have children, do not give me advice. (One would think this is common sense but no, every one has this one cousin or friend and you know what... I don't care. )

 

2. Do not tell me "well at least.... you fill in the blank." Ok I get it, there are women who have had harder pregnancies then I but honestly every pregnancy is different and I do not have to like it. Yes, God has given me the most precious gift and Man!, am I grateful and I tell God every day how grateful I am but the last thing I need to hear is how it could be worse and you to make me feel guilty. Just saying.

 

3. Forget being comfortable. There is nothing comfortable about the ninth month. However there is an over abundance of sleepless nights, feeling like you're going to piss your pants, anxiety, and the clothes... just forget clothes. I posted once before about my new hatred of pants. It hasn't gone away, but the skirt wearing has. I won't lie to you... I stay home all day and it's usually in my chonies so... don't ring my doorbell.

 

4. Control... or a lack of. You use to think you were in control of your body but now... nope. Get ready to laugh, cry, throw up, and feel like once again you are going to pee your pants All...At... The... Same... TIME!

 

5. Margaritas still sound so good.

 

6. The birth plan... so here is the deal... Nothing with birth is predictable but if you have a birth plan, just don't discuss it with others if you do not want what I have gotten. I am going all natural, no drugs, no nothing because 1. My spine is fused. 2. C Sec would be done under general and I don't want to be knocked out during his birth. 3. Pregnancy is not a sickness and I am not scared of pain. However, people do not understand my whole reasoning and all I do is defend, defend, defend MY choices. MY- key term here. (My husband constitutes as MY too. We are on the same page on this.) Also... I get this, you will think differently when it starts to hurt... ok yo.. 3 spinal surgeries and if my mother can do it, so can I. Watch this... I am going to prove you wrong. How? Why? Because I am still a Reeves kid, and if you tell me I can't you just gave me all the ammunition in the world to do the opposite.

 

7. This is such a stressful time and people take advantage of you.

 

8. It is so hard sometimes to remember you aren't the only one miserable here. Forgetting your husbands feelings is easy. Especially when you were blessed with a husband like mine who is so laid back about stuff.

9. I miss my feet, and my Lane peacock boots, and my Nikes and my Calvins. The swelling in the end is awful. My feet feel like they will explode.

 

10. "Is it ever going to end?"- This feeling is the worst. And please... do not tell me about how your first pregnancy you were three weeks over due. I'm holding on to a little bit of hope here and you are making me nervous.