#575 #505 ... For life yo!

I've been on a little bit of a blogging hiatus lately because things have been super busy. Also, I'm a little bit lazy. My apologies. Between school, raising a one year old (Note: I have yet to come to terms with this.), Baby Daddy's work schedule, and being stuck in Tex-ass I just haven't found the energy to sit down and write. This month has also been a little hard for me. A year ago we lost our sweet Grammy and it still feels like it was yesterday because not only am I lazy, I'm also really, really, really bad at mourning.

So...let's catch up!

Bam! Those are my grades right now. With roughly 46 days left out of about 110  I am kind of patting myself on the back right now. Let me tell you... it has been a struggle. Do you know what's harder then going to school with a newborn? Going to school with a one year old, obviously. My sweet little boy is EVERYWHERE! In fact if he were here right now this blog would look like this... jljg liYA;OYzriysiY'V$ua"ciyYA'VU4" u"ouvvvcUDOKH;Ok Y"oy. Do you know why? Because the Smarty Pants has recently discovered that Momma's laptop is the coolest thing EVER and also not something he is allowed to play with. Which makes it that much cooler. Thankfully he is snug in his bed with his little Max the Raccoon and Pooh Bear!

Speaking of the Smarty Pants, let us now address the elephant in the room. The fact that I am now a mother of a one year old. Let me tell you folks... I never in a million years imagined this. I imagined myself pregnant once, I imagined myself with a baby, but now I am freaking out. Holy shit y'all... I have a one year old. One of these days I'll have a five year old and then ... a teenager. It's a strange feeling to wake up and wonder how your parents did it. Also, if I am about to pay for my raising which I think I am, I would just like to offer my parents an apology for being such a brat. I called my Dad and Step-Mom the other night so I could wish my Step-Mom a happy birthday and while I was on the phone with my Dad I told him about Reeves recent little defiant streak he's been going through. Baby thinks that it is hilarious to feed the dogs. Being as how Murphy has the most sensitive stomach ever I try to keep an eye on this. The other day I told Baby not to feed the dogs and I know he knows what this means. We have been over it a million times. So what does he do... he picks up another piece of pasta and throws it on the ground while staring me down.  Do you know what my Dad had to say about this... he laughed and said... "Yessss.... it's a beautiful thing Baby!" I have to admit though... I am a little excited my kid exhibits so much of my personality because I am hoping it makes him tough and stubborn. I hope that my son will be the kind of person that never let's anyone walk all over him and he'll be brave enough to stand up for himself and others. My own little John Wayne.

So now I am going to be really real with you guys... You may already know this about me but here we go.... I. hate. Texas. It's true. I came here with an open mind but I'm not impressed. Here is the thing, Baby Daddy has an awesome job here that has allowed me to stay home and focus on Baby Love and school and for that we are so grateful but come on... this place is not my favorite. Here are some of the reasons why I am NOT in love with this place:

1.Public Land (or lack of)- Come on y'all! There isn't anywhere to hunt here and you want me to pay how much for a lease??? Maybe I am spoiled rotten after growing up in my little mountain paradise or my HiLo country but you have to admit, this is ridiculous. I was under the impression y'all loved to kill shit.
2. Gun laws- Do I really need to go into this? I will give you a little cred on the whole castle law thing but otherwise...
3. Texas highways/drivers- What is up with all of these frontage roads. Can't we be consistent? Also... blinkers! They are useful, they could save your life, use them.
4. Sports and Shopping- Ok I do love shopping but there isn't anything else better to do here and after awhile it get's old.
5. Let's just admit it... if Texas was so wonderful Texans wouldn't spend their weekends traveling to New Mexico. (Credit for this one goes to my husband for recently pointing it out to me.)
6. Area Codes- I come from the land that has two... I am SO confused with all these damn area codes!

I'm going to stop there before I get myself in trouble. Basically I just miss my state. This is the first time I have ever lived outside of New Mexico and it will be the last. It's just to far from family and home and quite frankly, we don't feel comfortable here.We like to hunt and fish, we like to take a drive up the mountain on a Sunday morning and not have to worry about traffic and a million other people.

Anyways... that's how I feel about that.

As for missing Grammy, it's not getting any easier. In fact it seems like it's getting harder. It kind of feels like someone just keeps ripping the band-aid off every time we all think it's going to be ok.